I'm Fine. It's Fine.

by Ashley Thompson July 31, 2020

I'm Fine. It's Fine.

“I’m fine.” Who says this? I tend to find myself saying “I’m fine,” when I’m stressed, overwhelmed or don’t want to burden someone else with my problems or concerns. What does this do? What does not acknowledging you need help actually accomplish? Not much really.

I’m fine. It’s fine.

You know what, I have a little secret to share… it’s fine, to not be fine. I know. Strong, successful women aren’t “allowed” to not be fine. We can’t let cracks show. We have to be able to balance home, career and social lives flawlessly and make it appear effortless, right? <insert “sarcasm font” here> Acknowledging you may need help - regardless of what it’s with - IS a sign of strength. We can’t be our best and give our best if we’re taking on the world, all on our own.

Lean on your support team - that could be your family, your coworkers, your peers, your friends. As much as we all want to be awesome at everything we do, it’s just not realistic. Allowing others to step in, not only will help lessen the stress in your life, but will give you the opportunity to step in for them when they need whatever it is that you’re awesome at. 

Sometimes, you’re just done.

Who can relate? Have you found yourself tired - physically, mentally and emotionally drained? 2020 has certainly been a patience-tester. Which is why finding an outlet to recharge is absolutely necessary. We can still be the best mom and need a little space. We can still work from home and still take a break from the notifications for a mental health day. We can still connect with family and friends and politely ask them to keep stressful, negative conversations to themselves. We are allowed to feel whatever it is that we feel but we also need to remember that the body needs rest to restore your mind, body and soul. So give yourself a break.

Make yourself a priority.

It’s not easy these days to put yourself first. Clients need you. Your partner needs you. Your kids need you. We’re often pulled in so many directions that it’s hard to finally settle and give yourself what you need. However, when you do and you give yourself a break and you’re able to regroup and reset, you can be more present for those around you. Being present and more mindful of what I’m doing and who I am with, has been a priority on my personal goal list.

If I’m with my family, my mind is with my family. If I’m working on a project for the office, my focus is there. It’s something I need to work on daily. It’s super easy to grab the phone and check messages while watching a movie with my kids before bed. They aren’t going to notice… right? Wrong, those little nuggets notice everything and they do indeed feel the disconnect.

Jumping from project to project at work may seem like expert multitasking, but really you’re not giving 100% to each task. I used to think of myself as a multitasking queen. It was a badge I wore with pride until at the end of the day I’d find myself looking at the to-do list that was still growing and yet wasn’t getting checked off. 100 half-finished projects and nothing completed. Talk about a stressor.

So be present and in the moment. Finding your balance takes time, but the rewards are well worth it.

I’m fine. It’s fine.

This is your reminder that again, it’s fine to not be fine. Let yourself be in your emotions for a minute. Let yourself feel what you need to, but don’t live in them. Find your ah-ha happy place and live in THAT moment. Recharge. Regroup. Rebalance. 2020 has been a tough year, but you’re tougher. You’ve got this.

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